What if what other people think about you is non of your concern? 

If another person looks at you, he doesn’t see YOU. He sees the image of you, he sees his interpretation of you. He sees the picture in his mind of you. The way you look or talk to him might resemble the way one of his parents, his ex, the bullies at school or who ever looked and talked to him… Your appearance in his life triggers an internal movie with feelings, emotions, thoughts and an attitude towards that movie. He doesn’t see you. You either trigger something positive or something negative within him… As a result he either likes you or he doesn’t.

As you see, it is an internal game within the other person. And as you see, it is not your business, it is not your monkey… it’s his.

What if what they say about you can only influence you if on some level you identify with what they say?

“If there is no enemy within, the enemy outside can do us no harm”

African proverb

What goes for others also goes for you and me.

Your inner reaction (the feelings, emotions, images, thoughts that come up) to what people say about you, tells you about your self image and the convictions you have about that self image. It tells you something about your relationship to your self image. Investigate what happens… what convictions are touched upon… see it for what it is and realize it originates from the past… it’s old and it’s old pain. Instead of blaming the other for your pain, investigate what is triggered and accept it for what it is right now.

Realize it is not you, you are neither your self image nor the judge of this self image. You are already free of this whole internal game… Don’t identify with your self image and don’t identify with the judging mind… they both happen in the consciousness that you essentially are. You are aware of both, you witness them both. Consciously or unconsciously you witness this from a place of spaciousness and silence. Identification is optional. If you identify, it seems like you are the self image and you are judged. You might feel bad accordingly. If you identify you give your self image strength, energy and it will grow in importance. If you stop and see identification is optional, you are free and nothing can harm you anymore. It is not about you, it is all about the self image and the judging mind. It is an internal game for you to watch, to witness… nothing else is required.

Non identification diminishes the power of the internal game and gives space for peace and a consciously chosen embodiment of the light that you essentially are.